Puerto Vallarta

I spent 6 days in Mexico for vacation! Here are a few pictures:

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Same Old Story

Hey y’all, how have you been? I’ve got something on my mind tonight that I need to write out. Yeah, it’s the age-old familiar theme that pervades my blog! (Sorry folks)

I never want a friend to ever ask me AGAIN if I’ve tried online dating. Yes, I’ve tried online dating for years. No, I haven’t had any success or even potential success. I had always relied on friends for companionship and a sense of belonging, but as my friends all got married and had kids, I’ve had to adjust how I view those two things. I’d like to find someone for a serious relationship, but it’s not easy at my ripe old age of 31.

Online dating goes in stages for me: optimism, impatience, false hope, then discouragement. I am optimistic every time I send a message to a woman; I probably value myself too highly already. Impatience quickly shows up when I end up waiting for a response…and waiting…and waiting. I cling to the false hope that the next time will be different. Not long after that, discouragement seeps in when no-one responds. I put myself out there for the first step, a leap of faith if you will, and continually remain ignored. I don’t like rejection – does anyone really? – but I always prefer a blunt and honest “no” to being ignored.

Online dating creates a false reality where people judge others like objects, like one bad characteristic negates anything good. Personality is a difficult thing to show with online dating, but it can be done. The problem is that personality rarely matters online — it’s all about physical appearance. People will always take a chance on someone they find attractive. The reasonable inference for ignoring my messages is that I’m not attractive enough to take that chance. It’s frustrating, discouraging and I don’t know why I keep persisting.

So, what should I do? I’ll take any and all advice. Fire away!